<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
1. First Breath<\/b><\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
All I can do is breathe
\nand crystal pebbles gently drop into me one after another
\nwith the sound of the childhood bell
\nannouncing that the always overweight and slightly asthmatic Santa Claus
\nfinally squeezed himself through the chimney
\n you never knew Christmas existed until you left home
\n for the first time
\n and saw all the lights on the main street
\n in the nearby city
\ncrouched on the bed
\neavesdropping
\nas if my sister and I could hear him crunching
\nthe cookies left on the dining table
\nby the never-used fire place
\nhis curly grey beard – unhinged and a bit smelly
\nfull of chocolate chips and peanut butter
\n \u201cChristian holy days stolen by greedy corporations
\n eager to sell us our own souls!\u201d your mom yelled
\n every December
\n embarrassed by endless poverty
\nthen, the glass of milk
\njust a bit sour
\nfrom so much waiting
\n \u201cGifts good only to be regifted
\n because money is tight and who needs all that crap!\u201d
\n she kept yelling starring at the empty stockings
\nfinally, Santa\u2019s belch
\nbecause a man is a man even when his main task is to bring
\nhappiness
\nto everyone
\n you, wrapping your thoughts in silvery paper
\n with gold stripes
\n and hanging them in the strands of hair of all the women
\nyou meet on your way
\nSanta\u2019s rowdy laughter strangely similar to the one
\nin the Salvation Army Christmas commercial
\n you, some forty years later
\n still laughing at yourself more than at anyone else
\n a bit tired but smiling
\n just like it befits a real man at the end of the work day
\nand off he goes!
\nup the narrow chimney
\ndesigned by an architect who stopped believing in
\nfairies, leprechauns, elves, spirits
\nand, of course, Santa Claus
\nafter he got his first erection
\nand didn\u2019t know what to do with it
\n you, still trying to imagine the best gift
\n that would heal
\n a woman\u2019s life-long missed opportunities and
\n fake orgasms
\nSanta, finally on the roof
\nlooking at the suburban neighbourhood where all houses
\nare one and the same
\nand all people share the same middle-class dreams
\nand nightmares
\nhunched under his bag full of Fisher-Price toys
\nand dollar store colouring books
\nfrom a time of economic recession and increasing mistrust
\n you, a bit shyly but bravely deciding that you<\/i>\u2019re the best gift of all<\/p>\n
\u201cWho knew that one\u2019s fate could still be prewritten long after
\nthe Greek gods fell quiet
\nand Oedipus came to terms with his crimes?\u201d<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
2. Last Breath<\/b><\/p>\n
To love you, all I need to do is breathe.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
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